Sunday, November 05, 2006


"Say 'Die you capitalist swine!'"

On the face of it, this may seem like any other Halloween party. A woman dressed as a fairy stands for a picture with a man dressed like a soldier. But let me provide some context here. The man on the left is not a soldier, he is a suicide bomber. You can tell because he has fake yet realistic looking dynamite attached to his mid-section which could, you know, falsely blow up. And lest you think this is just some dolt with little sense of humor and even less common sense, you should know that this picture was taken at the house of the new President of the University of Pennsylvania, the very institution that is using my borrowed hundred dollar bills to wipe its collective ass, and the fairy standing next to said dolt is the President of that institution. This is what we in the industry call "a mistake."

Everyone now: DOH!

Anyway, back to MFSAFP(p!)! Week 9 isn't over yet, but the results are in, mainly because nobody in their right mind (and nobody in the pool) would put money on the Raiders on Monday Night. I'll post the weekly standings and the updated yearly standings as well on Tuesday after the Monday Night game is complete, but right now I can announce the winner of the pool came down to two people, both with seven wins going into the Sunday night game. One chose New England (uh, that would be me) and the other chose Indianapolis. Despite turning the ball over whenever they had a chance to, the Patriots almost pulled it out at the end, but unfortunately for me they didn't. This was fortunate for...

Joey Bansen! Congratulations (again) Joey! You're the big wiener for Week 9. You win a pint of Official Bill Parcells Man Milk, squoze from the nipples of the man himself. No, actually you win the Weekly Standard Prize (WSP) of $52. I recommend you spend it on ads attacking Scott Rozsa, such as this one:

[cue menacing music]
Are you still unsure about Scott Rozsa? You should know that Scott Rozsa has voted with the Washington Redskins 80% of the time.* And each time Scott Rosza has won the football pool, he's spent his winnings on crack and hookers.** Is that how you want your money to be spent?

Scott Rosza: Wrong on hookers, wrong on the Redskins, wrong for the pool. I'm Joey Bansen, and I approved this message.
*may not actually be true
**absolutely true, unless it isn't

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