Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Week 8: Schedule

Here's your Week 8 schedule. Week 8 starts at 1pm EST this Sunday, October 31. Need yr picks by then.

Denver at San Francisco
Buffalo at Kansas City
Washington at Detroit
Carolina at St. Louis
Green Bay at New York Jets
Miami at Cincinnati
Jacksonville at Dallas
Tennessee at San Diego
Minnesota at New England
Seattle at Oakland
Tampa Bay at Arizona
Pittsburgh at New Orleans
Houston at Indianapolis (Plus Total Points)

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Week 7: Results

Originally I wrote "Week 7: Resluts".

On to the pool(poop!)!

When last we left our intrepid heros - you remember, the ones with the large genitalia - they were attempting to catch my brother in the pool(poop!)!  Having a one game lead and having picked the Giants on Monday night, only one man could catch Sandy Kory. 

Josh Money was that man. 

When the Cowboys got out to a big lead early I was thinking Josh was in the Money (I'm so so sorry), but it wasn't to be.  After Tony Romo's shoulder was crushed into a fine powder (and summarily snorted) by a Giants lineman, the game got an air of inevitability about it.  Maybe it was that the Cowboys back up quarterback is John Kitna who I swear I thought was out of the league several years ago (and oddly enough may be starting for my fantasy football team this coming week).  Or maybe it was that Jerry Jones' face was stuck on the "tragedy" setting (stupid cheap batteries!).  But with each Giants touchdown the Cowboys season melted further and further away - not unlike Jones' face - and with it went Josh Money's chances to defend his Weekly Standard Prize.

That means this week's big wiener is SANDY KORY!!!  Congratulations to Sandy!  To commemorate your big victory, you win a somewhat opened package of partially cooked sausages that vaguely resemble Jerry Jones skin tone!  If you squint just right at it, you can see Jones smiling a big smile and say'n 'Hey Sandy, congratulations!  Go ahead!  Take a big bite!"  And if you do take that big bite you'll actually see him saying it before you pass out in a pool of your own vomit and other assorted bodily fluids!


Here are the Final Weekly Standings (FWS) for Week 7:

1. Sandy Kory ... 12-2
2. Robin Wood ... 11-3
3. John Weaver ... 10-4
3. Josh Money ... 10-4
5. Alex Mena ... 9-5
5. George Smith ... 9-5
5. Bill Denton ... 9-5
5. Matthew Mariam ... 9-5
5. Dave Labowitz ... 9-5
5. Karl Vaillancourt ... 9-5
5. Zack Klein ... 9-5
12. Joey Bansen ... 8-6
12. Matthew Kory ... 8-6
14. Gedeon Mariam ... 7-7
15. Jonathan Peter Andrew Herald Oregano Stover ... 0-4,567 (actually 6-8)

Week 7 created some waves in the Current Overall Standings (COS).  Zack and John have flip-flopped places at the top on the basis of Zack's sub-par week (for him - if it was me I'd be throwing a damn party) and John's strong one.  Josh Money and Alex Mena are hang'n tough at #3 and 4 respectively (I already made a New Kids On The Block joke right?).  Our big movers this week are somewhat predictably Sandy who went from 13th overall to tied for 6th and Jonathan Jackson Pierre-Gustave Toutant-Beauregard Green-Ellis Van McStover who's plunge from 7th to 13th is at least partially due to the weight of his name.

Anyway, here are the Current Overall Standings (COS) through Week 7:

1. John Weaver ... 66-38
2. Zack Klein ... 65-39
2. Josh Money ... 65-39
4. Alex Mena ... 64-40
5. Matthew Mariam ... 63-41
6. Sandy Kory ... 62-42
6. Bill Denton ... 62-42
8. George Smith ... 60-44
8. Dave Labowitz ... 60-44
8. Karl Vaillancourt ... 60-44
11. Matthew Kory ... 59-45
12. Gedeon Mariam ... 58-46
13. Jonathan Horatio Granderson-Stover-Finkelsteinington Jones ... 58-46
14. Robin Wood ... 57-47
15. Joey Bansen ... 56-48

The schedule for Week 8 should be up shortly.  Congrats again to my brother, and have a great week, my peeps. 

Week 7: Update 2

Sorry folks, I like to have the results up by Tuesday morning but circumstances have dictated that its going to be a bit later. I hope to have the results and the schedule for Week 8 up by tonight. Sorry for the delay.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Week 7: Update

Wow, was Week 7 a strange week.  There were crazy comebacks (Cincy versus Atlanta), re-comebacks (Atlanta versus Cincy), and almost comebacks (Min versus GB).  The Redskins and Bears turned the ball over seven times... in the second half.  Oakland threatened to be the first team in a while to score over 70 points, but leading 59-14 after three quarters they called off the dogs.  There were huge upsets (Cleveland over New Orleans?), and almost upsets (Buffalo losing in OT to Baltimore).

But you knew all that already.  How did it impact the pool(poop)?  Well, lemme tell ya like this.

Going into Monday night, we have one person with 11 wins, and two with ten.  Sandy Kory, my brother, has 11 wins, while Robin Wood (in her best showing so far!) and Josh Money have 10.  Sadly for Robin, she picked the same team to win on Monday night - the Giants - that Sandy picked, so she can't make up the necessary game and therefore can't win this week. 

Josh went with the Cowboys however so should Dallas win Josh and Sandy will be tied.  If that happens, it'll come down to Monday Night Points (MNP!)!

In that case, Josh is in luck this week, because my brother, being a funny guy an idiot, picked 87 total points!  Ha Ha!  Hilarious!  If you find fucking yourself out of $70 is hilarious.*

*For the record, fucking yourself out of $70 is hilarious.

Josh picked 50 points, but it doesn't really matter.  If the Giants win Sandy will have 12 wins and will be crowned this week's big wiener despite actually being a moron.  If Dallas wins and the total score is 86 or under, Josh Money will have successfully defended his crown.  Just to be clear, if Dallas wins 48-28, Josh will win the pool and my brother will win a swift kick to the groinal region.

Best of luck to you both!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Week 7: Schedule

Week 7 starts this coming Sunday, October 24th at 1pm EST (that's 10am PST for those of who live out west).  Be sure to get your picks to me by then.

Cincinnati at Atlanta
Buffalo at Baltimore
Cleveland at New Orleans
San Francisco at Carolina
Philadelphia at Tennessee
St. Louis at Tampa Bay
Washington at Chicago
Jacksonville at Kansas City
Pittsburg at Miami
Arizona at Seattle
New England at San Diego
Oakland at Denver
Minnesota at Green Bay
NY "Anne Geddes Makes Me Puke" Giants at Dallas (plus total points)

Week 6: Results

Its time, once again, to go deep deep, possibly a bit too deep inside the NFL.

For us prognosticators, Week 6 was a tough nut to crack. What with all the parity going on and all, who can say what is going to happen?  I mean, really, who's better, Detroit or the New York "Hanky Panky Skanky" Giants? Any time over the last 30 years that would be a silly question to ask, but this season the Lions hung with the Giants. Same with my Redskins and the Colts. Pick any random point over the last decade including any time during the off season or when Peyton Manning was taking a dump, and the Colts still would've killed the Redskins. This season it was a one field goal game. Throw two overtime games into the mix and its all a total crapshoot. At least that's what I'm telling myself after going 7-7 this week. This week's winner may beg to differ.

Say, that reminds me, who did win Week 6 here at MFSAFP(p!)!?  In the words of Buckwheat, lets take a listen!  When last we spoke we had, lets say, a two and a half person race. On one hand we had Matthew Mariam and Josh Money and their ten wins apiece. On the other we had John Weaver, his nine wins and his crazy pick of Jacksonville to win the Monday nighter. John was the only one in the entire pool to pick Jacksonville, and you know what happens when you go out on a limb like that? That's right, the entire pool takes a stinky dump on your head.  Metaphorically speaking, of course.

The final score of the Monday night game was 30-3, but unfortunately for John, it wasn't as close as the score indicated. In a game that was a huge mismatch from the coin flip (Tennessee had the call and picked "land on its side") the Flaming Thumbtacks whipping the ever-lov'n sheet out of Jacksonville in front of approximately seven people, four of whom were contractually obligated to attend.

But back to the Pool(poop!)! As you may remember, if Tennessee won and the score was 42 or less, Josh Money was this week's big weiner, and low and behold that's exactly what happened!  Fantastic prognostication!  An extra hearty and capitalized Congratulations to Josh Money who has graciously agreed to donate his entire weekly winnings to the Our Lady Of Perpetual Sorrow church!  (editor's note: sorry Josh, we got our wires crossed a bit on that one)

So good job to Josh. You win this week's Weekly Standard Prize, which through a hilarious Wall Street trick, has been combined with the WSP for Weeks 8, 13 and 15, cut into a thousand little bits and sold to Chinese fur traders in Pakistan. Enjoy!

Here are the final standings for Week 6.

1. Josh Money ... 11-3
1. Matthew Mariam ... 11-3
3. Karl Vaillancourt ... 10-4
4. Bill Denton ... 9-5
4. Joey Bansen ... 9-5
4. Dave Labowitz ... 9-5
4. John Weaver ... 9-5
4. Gedeon Mariam ... 9-5
9. Jon Stover ... 8-6
9. Sandy Kory ... 8-6
9. Robin Wood ... 8-6
9. Zack Klein ... 8-6
13. Alex Mena ... 7-7
13. George Smith ... 7-7
13. Matthew Kory ... 7-7

We now move on to the Current Overall Standings, where we find Zack Klein, much like '80s boy band New Kids on the Block, Hang'n Tough in the top spot.  But its not all Klein all the time.  Nope, Zack has company now with John Weaver, who I'd like to point out would be all alone in first if he hadn't picked Jacksonville to win tonight.  Good call on that one, John!  That said, those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones and those who life in what is essentially a tie for twelfth place - such as myself - shouldn't talk shit lest they get some of the shit smeared on their face by someone who is bigger stronger and smarter than them.  In a related story, I love John Weaver!

And now its time for the Obligatory Dave Labowitz Joke Of The Week! (ODLJOTW!)!  I have to admit going into this year my only goal was to keep up with Dave Labowitz. In the words of a great American, Mission Accomplished! 

Here are the Current Overall Standings through Week 6:

1. Zack Klein ... 56-34
1. John Weaver ... 56-34
3. Josh Money ... 55-35
4. Alex Mena ... 54-36
4. Matthew Mariam ... 54-36
6. Bill Denton ... 53-37
7. Jon Stover ... 52-38
8. Gedeon Mariam ... 51-39
8. Matthew Kory ... 51-39
8. Dave Labowitz ... 51-39
8. George Smith ... 51-39
8. Karl Vaillancourt ... 51-39
13. Sandy Kory ... 50-40
14. Joey Bansen ... 48-42
15. Robin Wood ... 46-44

Congrats again to Josh, who I was rooting for because Matthew Mariam had the gall, the sheer chutzpah, to tie me in fantasy football .*shakes fist violently* I'll get you, Mariam, if its the last thing I do! 

The schedule for Week 7 will be up shortly.  Enjoy your week, everyone.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Week 6: Update

I'm not a Peyton Manning hater.  Some people are, but I'm not.  I mean, he's just an incredible quarterback.  And as a Redskins fan I get abused by him so infrequently that I can actually appreciate him.  That said, with the clock stopped, a minute left in the game which is effectively over, and everyone knowing you're going to run the dam ball, do you have to do the stupid ass leg pump four times then run around in circles pointing at invisible animals? 

Week 6!  Here after known as The Week I Didn't Do Very Well In!  Which, as you'll notice, does not distinguish it from four of the previous five weeks!  

Fifteen entered, but only three remain.  Yes, Week 6 has come down to three people.  Matthew Mariam and Josh "I'm the" Money both have 10 wins and Tennessee for the Monday nighter.  The ever pesky John Weaver has 9 wins and inexplicably picked Jacksonville.  (Seriously, you know they blow, right John?) If Jacksonville wins John, Matthew, and Josh will all have 10 wins.  If Tennessee wins, Josh and Matthew will be on top the totem pole with 11 wins each.  Here's how it breaks down.

If Jacksonville wins...
It'll come down to Monday Night Points!  Josh picked 37, John picked 42 and Matthew picked *drum roll* 43.  Meaning, John's F'd .  If the total score is between 0 and 41, Josh wins.  If it's 42 on the nose John wins, and if its 43 or over Matthew wins. 

If Tennessee wins...
It'll come down to Monday Night Points!  If the total score is between 0 and 42 Josh will win.  If its 43 or greater Matthew will win. 

That's it from the republic of Portland.  Good luck to all involved.  Stay tuned for the Weekly Report which'll happen tomorrow night if I can sleep this one off. 


Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Week 6: Schedule

Keep yer pants on, here's the schedule for Week 6:

Atlanta at Philadelphia
Seattle at Chicago
Cleveland at Pittsburgh
Detroit at NY "Digestive Discomfort" Giants
Baltimore at New England
San Diego at St. Louis
Miami at Green Bay
New Orleans at Tampa Bay
Kansas City at Houston
New York Jets at Denver
Oakland at San Francisco
Dallas at Minnesota
Indianapolis at Washington
Tennessee at Jacksonville (plus total points)

Week 5: Results: Now With Swearing!

Ah, the fickle tastes of Monday Night Points. 

You may recall from last night's hilarious update Week 5 had come down to a four person race.  Alex Mena and Gedeon Mariam both had 8 wins and had hitched their proverbial horse to Minnesota on Monday Night.  Matthew Mariam and I both had 7 wins and New York.  If New York won, it was a four way tie, if Minnesota won, it was a two way tie.

As you know by now New York won.  Meaning it came down to a four way tie, so we'd need Monday Night Points!  A quick recap:

If the total points scored is 53 or greater, Gedeon wins. If its 52 on the nose, Alex wins. If its between 45 and 51, Matthew wins. If its 44 or less, I win.

The final score was 29-20 for a total of 49 points meaning Matthew Mariam is this week's winner!  Congratulations to (IF FAVRE DOESN'T THROW THAT LAST DAMN PICK-6 WITH A MINUTE REMAINING THE SCORE TOTALS 42 AND I WIN THE DAMN POOL FUCK BRETT FAVRE FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK HIM AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! [INJURES WRIST HITTING SELF IN HEAD]) Matthew Mariam who is a worthy winner!  Good show, Matthew. 

Yes, Matthew, a hearty Well Done! this week.  And, for your fantastic efforts, you win this week's special prize!  An autographed photo of Brett Favre!  That I have shat on!  Enjoy! 

Before we go through the final standings, you should all know that it was a tough week all around.  So don't feel too badly when you see how you did.  When the pool is won by a someone with only eight games, well, you know it was a brutal week.  

We had several games that were almost impossible to call.  Only one person correctly picked Oakland over San Diego (ME ME ME!!) and only one person got Tampa beating Cincinnati (Gedeon Mariam).  Nobody picked New Orleans to lose to Arizona, and considering the repeatedly fluky luck involved, we should be congratulating ourselves for getting that one wrong.  If they play that game again twenty times, New Orleans wins it every time. 

The real deciders, so to speak, this week were Washington beating Green Bay (54% correct), Chicago beating Carolina (38% correct) and the New York "Workers Paradise" Giants absolutely crushing Houston (15%). 

Also, as a Redskins fan, it is my sworn duty to let you know the Cowboys lost and are 1-3.  

The final standings for Week 5 are as follows:

1. Matthew Mariam ... 8-6
1. Matthew Kory ... 8-6
1. Gedeon Mariam ... 8-6
1. Alex Mena ... 8-6
5. Jon Stover .. 7-7
5. Bill Denton ... 7-7
7. George Smith ... 6-8
7. Dave Labowitz ... 6-8
7. Robin Wood ... 6-8
7. Sandy Kory ... 6-8
7. Josh Money ... 6-8
7. Karl Vaillancourt ... 6-8
7. John Weaver ... 6-8
14. Zack Klein ... 5-9
15. Joey Bansen ... 4-10

We've got a new leader this week in the overall standings.  Well, not new new, but he's all by his lonesome for the first time, and that's Zack Klein.  John Weaver fell a game behind Zack while Alex Mena climbed into a second place tie. After that, things get murkier. 

1. Zack Klein ... 48-28
2. Alex Mena ... 47-29
2. John Weaver ... 47-29
4. George Smith ... 44-32
4. Matthew Kory ... 44-32
4. Bill Denton ... 44-32
4. Jon Stover ... 44-32
4. Josh Money ... 44-32
9. Matthew Mariam ... 43-33
10. Dave Labowitz ... 42-34
10. Gedeon Mariam ... 42-34
10. Sandy Kory ... 42-34
13. Karl Vaillancourt ... 41-35
14. Joey Bansen ... 39-39
15. Robin Wood ... 38-40

Week 6 Schedule to come.  Congrats again to Matthew Mariam, whom I'd like to formally invite to take a long walk off my newly painted short pier, preferably with some new and highly fashionable cement shoes.  I'll even spring for your pair! 

Have a great week everyone!*

*Except Matt.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Week 5: Update

I am an idiot, but we'll cover that in a second. 

For now, Week 5 is a four person race.  The pack is led by Gedeon Mariam and Alex Mena, both with 8 wins, both of who have picked Minnesota to beat the Jets on Monday night.  That, my friends, is called an opening. 

Three people trail Gedeon and Alex by a game.  Jon Stover, Matthew Mariam, and yours truly - pause for shock - all have 7 wins so far and are thus a single game behind the leaders.  But, because Jon picked Minnesota as Gedeon and Alex did, he can't gain the necessary game on them.  So, sadly, he can't win the week.  So sorry, Jon. 

Contrary to Jon, Matthew and I both picked the Jets to beat Minnesota.  If that happens, there will be a four way tie between Alex, Gedeon, myself, and Matthew.  If it doesn't, the tie will be two way between Gedeon and Alex.

So here's the breakdown:

If Minnesota wins...

Gedeon and Alex will be tied with 9 wins so it'll come down to Monday Night Points!  Gedeon picked 53 total points and Alex picked 52 so if the score is 53 totals or greater Gedeon wins.  If it totals 52 or less, Alex wins. 

If New York wins...

Gedeon and Alex's 8 win party will be joined by Matthew and I.  Matthew picked 45 points and I picked 36.  So if the total points scored is 53 or greater, Gedeon wins.  If its 52 on the nose, Alex wins.  If its between 45 and 51, Matthew wins.  If its 44 or less, I win.  Go me. 

Oh, and why am I an idiot?  Well, let this be a lesson to all you kids out there.  When submitting your picks, make sure you've entered a pick for each game.  Not entering a pick for each game is like picking Buffalo to win - you may as well just not bother. 

If you check my picks for the week (I submit my picks before the first game into the comments section of each week's schedule post) I foolishly neglected to choose a winner between Denver and Baltimore.  I didn't chose either team, and so, in the words of a great American, I gets none. 

I'll tell you right now, there's no way in hell I'd have chosen Denver, and I'd have told you that before the game and after the game regardless of who won.  Doesn't matter.  Not good enough.  No game was submitted (and still isn't) and so I don't get credit.  Meaning I could easily have had 8 games won, and be in a position where my Monday Night pick winning would mean I won the pool.  But no.  I'm an idiot. 


Tuesday, October 05, 2010

Week 5: Schedule

Here is your Week 5 Schedule, peeps. Week 5 officially commences on Sunday at 1pm EST.  Need your picks by that time, puh-leeese.

Jacksonville at Buffalo            
Denver at Baltimore            
Kansas City at Indianapolis
Green Bay at Washington            
St. Louis at Detroit
Chicago at Carolina            
Tampa Bay at Cincinnati
Atlanta at Cleveland            
New York “Reliant Robin” Giants at Houston
New Orleans at Arizona
Tennessee at Dallas
San Diego at Oakland
Philadelphia at San Francisco
Minnesota at New York Jets (plus total points)

Week 4: Results

My, does time fly.  Seems like just yesterday I was pooping in my diapers and today, well, I'm pooping right in my pants.  Things sure do change fast, don't they?

One thing that doesn't change, apparently, is me not winning.  I felt pretty good about my picks this week, but like the other three weeks this year, I wasn't nearly good enough.  Nope.  Jon Stover, and Zack Klein both pulled down eleven wins.  Karl Vaillancourt made a valiant attempt to join the eleven win club, but Miami fell short by about 30 points - doh!  Nice try anyway, Karl.

So it came down to Jon Stover versus Zack Klein.  One thing I discovered while writing this post is you can't make a good anagram out of either of Jon Stover's or Zack Klein's names unless you include their middle names which are "Goatsmilk" and Framboise, respectively.

The Monday Night game totaled 55 points.  Zack guessed 19 but Jon out-guessed him by choosing 43. So by virtue of the fact that Jon was closer to the actual total, which is the point in the first place, Jon Stover is this week's big wiener!

A hearty congratulations goes out to Jonananananathan Goatsmilk Stovererer, IV!  That sentence is even funnier if you try to read it out loud.  Anyway.  But, before we get ourselves all worked up, ya know what?  Normally Jon would win a flaming set of matching toads, or an almanac from 1832 with penises drawn in sharpie on every page, but this week I'm not even going to make something up for Jon to win.  You know why?  Ol' Goatsmilk bought a monthly pass on Jet Blue Airlines - he could fly anywhere in the country he wanted - and he went just about everywhere EXCEPT Portland, Oregon.  Know who lives in Portland, Oregon?  Nobody apparently, except yours truly.  So, Goatsmilk, you win the damn WSP of $70, alright?  Get off my back.  Also, I hereby deputize George Smith (of the 38-24 Smiths) to boot your nads right good.  Enjoy.  And congratulations.  

Here are the final standings for Week 4:

1. Jon Stover ... 11-3
1. Zack Klein ... 11-3
3. Sandy Kory ... 10-4
4. Josh Money ... 9-5
4. Matthew Kory ... 9-5
4. Alex Mena ... 9-5
4. Karl Vaillancourt ... 9-5
8. John Weaver ... 8-6
8. Matthew Mariam ... 8-6
8. Dave Labowitz ... 8-6
8. George Smith ... 8-6
8. Bill Denton ... 8-6
13. Robin Wood ... 7-7
13. Gedeon Mariam ... 7-7
15. Joey Bansen ... 6-8

Just for fun I took a quick look at how we as a whole did the best on all the games.  Here's how we did in chart form:

As you can see, everybody guessed New Orleans, Green Bay, Atlanta, and Houston would win.  Nobody guessed Indianapolis would lose to Jacksonville.  Only four people picked Washington over Philadelphia, Denver over Tennessee, Cleveland over Cincinnati, and the Bears over the Giants.  Only one person picked Buffalo to beat the Jets (they got crushed) and only one person picked Arizona to beat San Diego (they got crushed). 

As for the Current Overall Standings (COS), we had a flip-flop at the very top with Zack Klein jumping ahead of John Weaver.  We're also seeing a fair bit of stratification already as Zack has a two game lead over the field and an eleven game lead over fifteenth place.  Also of note, I am tied with Dave Labowitz.  In case you were wondering, that is an insult.

1. Zack Klein ... 43-19
2. John Weaver ... 41-21
3. Alex Mena ... 39-23
4. Josh Money ... 38-24
4. George Smith ... 38-24
6. Bill Denton ... 37-25
6. Jon Stover ... 37-25
8. Sandy Kory ... 36-26
8. Matthew Kory ... 36-26
8. Dave Labowitz ... 36-26
11. Joey Bansen ... 35-27
11. Karl Vaillancourt ... 35-27
11. Matthew Mariam ... 35-27
14. Gedeon Mariam ... 34-28
15. Robin Wood ... 32-30

The schedule for Week 5 will be posted shortly.  Congrats again to Goatsmilk Stover.  Hope them balls ain't too sore after Dr. Smith gets a'hold of 'em.

Monday, October 04, 2010

Week 4: Update! [Now With Accuracy!!]

[Warning: this post has been edited for accuracy.  the truth, gentle souls, is when i write posts at 1am PST mistakes are sometimes made.]

Good evening, folks.  Its been a long but exciting weekend here at MFSAFP(p!)!HQ.  Just got back from the Columbia Gorge where everything is pretty, even in the rain.  Fortunately, we made it through the whole weekend without the wet stuff and even hit up the Hood River Hopsfest where, true story, we drank beer till our heads hurt.

While I was running about the gorge, large sweaty mens in tight pants were hurling themselves at each other while other sweaty mens were throwing balls all about.  It must have been a sight to see.  Sadly, I missed it all, but through the magic of the internets I know exactly what happened.

Thirteen/fourteenths of Week 4 have been completed and we know this much: we have a two leaders and a few followers.  The One leader is Jon Stover, who I believe is currently being held captive by Peruvian rebels at, and this part hasn't yet been confirmed, the state route twelve Burger King.  Jon has ten wins so far.

So does Zack Klein. I am unaware of Mr. Klein's whereabouts, but I know this: the man can count, which is more than can be said of yours truly.

Three Two people have nine wins so far.  Those people are Sandy Kory, Zack Klein, and Karl Vaillancourt.  In order to catch Jon those people have to pick up one game on him with only one remaining.  Both Jon and Zack picked New England over Miami in Monday Night's AFC East slugfest.  So did Sandy, meaning no matter what happens on Monday, Sandy will be a game behind Jon and Zack.  Karl picked Miami.  So he's got a chance.

If Miami wins on Monday then Zack, Jon and Karl will be tied with ten wins and we'll have ourselves a good old fashioned Monday Night Points-off! (MNP-o!)!  Zack picked 19, Karl went with 29 total points and Jon has 43.  If Miami wins and the total score is 28 or under, Zack wins.  If its between 29 and 42, Karl wins. If its 43 or over, Jon wins. 

If New England wins tonight, and the final score is between zero and 42, Zack wins.  If New England wins and the final score is 43 or over, Jon wins. 

Tune in tomorrow for the exciting conclusion and a bunch of other hilarious crap, like the Current Overall Standings (COS).  It'll be a dandy.

I'd also like to point out that Sandy was the only one to pick Buffalo to beat the Jets.  They lost 38-14 so he doesn't deserve to win anyway.