Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Week 1: Results

After a small snafu in my update last night, which was so kindly corrected by my brother, I am able to bring you the actual and correct winner of the Week 1 Weekly Standard Prize (WSP).

As you may recall, since everyone had picked both Monday Night games the same (good show, people) this one came down to Monday Night Points. And since there were five of you assrammers at the top this week, it got kinda interesting. Here is the corrected version of the breakdown of the MNP for the Oakland/SD game.

If the San Diego/Oakland game totaled:

*Between 0-33 points, George Smith will win.

*Between 34-36 points, Zack Klein will win.

*37 or 38 points and Dave Labowitz will win.

*Between 39 and 47 points and Joey Bansen will win.

*And, anything 48 points or higher and Josh Money will win.

As you may be aware, the score of the Chargers/Raiders game was 24-20, meaning 44 points were scored, so Joey Bansen is the first weekly winner of MTAFP(p!)!'s WSP! Congratulations, Joey.

For winning the WSP, you'll receive either a steeltoed boot to the testicles, or a check in the amount of $70! Your choice! Shoot me an email if you prefer the former cause I'll have to get in touch with some people I know in Arizona who should be able to take care of you, no prob. As for the rest of you assclowns (of which I myself am most certainly included for I do live in Assclownia, PA), better luck next week.

So, without further ado, (POOP!) here are the standings after this fabulous week of deliciously moist football action:

1. Joey Bansen...13-3 (Winner of WSP by MNP!)
1. Dave Labowitz...13-3
1. George Smith...13-3
1. Zack Klein...13-3
1. Josh Money...13-3
6. Jon Stover...12-4 (MORON!)
6. Adam Roy...12-4
6. Matthew Mariam...12-4
6. Karl Vaillancourt...12-4
6. Gedeon Mariam...12-4
6. Dan Sinclair...12-4
12. John Weaver...11-5
12. Sandy Kory...11-5
12. Alex Mena...11-5
12. Bill Denton...11-5
10,000,000,000. Matt "Holy Shit I Suck" Kory...10-6

As the week's go along I'll be publishing both the weekly standings as well as the cumulative standings each week, but since this is Week 1 they're the same. Duh. Also, if you think I've calculated your record incorrectly, then I probably have. Please email me, let me know and we'll figure it out if you're able to talk me through simple addition and subtraction.

The schedule for Week 2 will be up shortly. Week 2 begins Sunday at 1pm EST, so I'll need all of your picks by then in my in-box if you are to be eligible for the WSP.

Have a great week, peeps.

1 comment:

Joey said...

You can go ahead and send the check my way. I'll take $25 of it to Walmart and buy a boot and self-apply it. That way everyone wins.