Monday, December 07, 2009

Week 13: Update

One more game to go in this week of our NFL season and we've got some serious turnover at the top. Howdy, folks. Hope your weekend wasn't as gut-wrenching as mine (thanks Redskins). Here at your beloved Pool(poop!) Headquarters (P(p!)Hq), its chaos, anarchy, bedlam, discord, a free-for-all, a holy mess, and a bunch of other synonyms for chaos that I found on reference.com. Ah... the series of tubes we call the internet. Thank you, Al Gore. Thank you.

Here is where we stand right now. Only one person managed more than 11 wins so far and that would be The Holy Reverend Jonald D. "Ol' Stinky Horseybottoms" Stover, IV Esq. with his 12. That puts Ol' Stinky Horseybottoms in sole possession of first place one game ahead of Adam "I Really Need The Money" Roy, Josh "I Really Am The Money" Money, and Alex "No Fancypants Nickname Here" Mena who all have 11.

[By the way, just in case you are wondering, "Hmmm... I know winning is important and all, but I sure am curious if anyone shat the bed so spectacularly this week that they are, oh, say seven games behind Ol' Stinky Horseybottoms and at least two games behind everyone else..." Well, funny you should wonder, because the answer is, amazingly, yes. Friends, I lay claim to that honor. And by 'honor' I mean 'sucking hard.' Real, real hard.]

To tie Reverend Horseybottoms, any one of the 11 Win Triumvirate (11WT) will have to catch him tonight and beat him on Monday Night Points. Sadly for Josh and Alex, Jon picked Green Bay over Baltimore tonight, and so did they, thus making it mathematically impossible for them to catch him. Of the 11WT, only Adam Roy picked Baltimore, meaning...

Adam Roy is our only hope.

Jon picked 41 MNP. Adam picked 42 MNP. This one's easy. So, here's how it works tonight. If Baltimore wins tonight, and the final score totals 42 or more, Adam wins. Any other scenario and Jon wins.

Best of luck to neither of you bastards.

Back tomorrow with more tales from the crypt the final standings for Week 13 and Week 14's schedule.
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1 comment:

Liberator713 said...

Very entertaining entry Mr. Matty. and I feel your pain about the Redskins. They gotta fire Suisham now, don't you think? he missed crucial game winning or tying field goals in their last 3 games. that team has pulled itself up from the gutters and is playing a hell of a lot better football of late and doesn't have anything to show for it.
Well at least we can take some solace in watching the Annual Late Season December Swoon of The Cowshits!!