Week 16: Update & Results (Oops)

[if you are looking for the Week 17 Schedule, you can access it here, or by scrolling down a post]

Apologies for posting this so late in the week. My excuse is its been a crazy week full of travel, babies, family, crying, friends, more babies, more family, some food, and, of course, poop. But its been fun.

But enough about me. To the pool(poop!)!

Last week was about as close as a week can get. Everyone was within three games of the top spot, and five of you tied for the lead. John Weaver, Zack Klein, Jon Stover, Dave Labowitz, and Karl Vaillancourt all led the week with 10 wins. So it came down to Monday Night Points! Yet again! Yay.

It was a NFC Central slug-match in the December cold, and everyone appropriately picked low MNP totals to match. However, things don't always go to plan, and the teams totaled 66 freakin points. Nobody came anywhere near going over. Dave, Stover and Karl all guessed in the 30s. Not unreasonable, but still, YOUGETSNONE! Zack Klein picked 43 MNP, but that was bested by the ever cleaver John Weaver, who guessed 44 MNP.

So, your Week 16 winner is... JOHN WEAVER!!! Congratulations to John for winning his second week this season. Unlike last time, John just wins the Weekly Standard Prize of $70. I'm guessing John uses it to help pay down the national debt. Because he's just that kind of guy.

Here are the final standings for Week 16:

1. John Weaver ... 10-6
1. Zack Klein ... 10-6
1. Jon Stover ... 10-6
1. Dave Labowitz ... 10-6
1. Karl Vaillancourt ... 10-6
6. Gedeon Mariam ... 9-7
6. Matthew Mariam ... 9-7
6. Adam Roy ... 9-7
6. Josh Money ... 9-7
6. Matthew Kory ... 9-7
11. Alex Mena ... 8-8
11. George Smith ... 8-8
13. Dan Sinclair ... 7-9
13. Sandy Kory ...7-9
13. Bill Denton ... 7-9
13. Joey Bansen ... 7-9

You may notice the presence of Bill Denton and Joey Bansen at the bottom of the weekly standings there. Week 16 is a tough time to finish last in the standings. Bill is still in it, but Joey is done. Sorry, Joey.

Your leader after 16 weeks of moist football-oriented action is Dave "Dollars" Labowitz. Magically, Dave has managed first place over all without winning any weeks this season so far. That's just hard to do. Or maybe Dave just sucks at Monday Night Points. Riding shotgun is Jon Stover, a game back of Dave. Jon is a Bills fan, so I'm fully expecting him to totally tank this coming week and finish 8th. After leading the pool by a wide margin through the first few weeks, Gedeon Mariam fell off a bit, but he's recovered enough to put himself in the money and within striking distance a game back of Jon and two behind Dave.

The real loser last week was Bill Denton who went from tied for first place to fourth, three games behind Dave. Bill's going to be throwing some serious turds at the wall this week hoping to climb back into the money, so if anyone lives within turd throwing distance of Dallas, Texas, I recommend you duck.

After Bill, it's going to take a ridiculous collapse of unprecedented proportions for anyone to get into the money slots (first, second, or third). Joey Bansen has the best shot at it, but he's four games back of Gedeon and he has to jump over Bill to get there. Good luck, Joey, but I don't think it's going to happen.

Other than that, the only race left is the race for last place. After sixteen weeks, my brother (Sandy) and I are locked in the Pool(poop!) version of the old East German licking matches. For those of you unfamiliar, behind the wall in the 70's boxing gloves were hard to come by. So East Germans made up the Licking Match where two people would enter the ring, usually a dirt floor surrounded by old sausage casings, and would proceed to lick each other until one of them threw up. The first one to barf lost.

My brother and I are in last place with 138 wins, a total the top of the pool(poop) reached four weeks ago. It comes down to this week. Will I pick the Browns and Lions to win? Will my brother ensure losing by forgetting to send in his picks? Stay tuned!

Here are your Current Overall Standings (COS) through Week 16:

1. Dave Labowitz ... 166-74
2. Jon Stover ... 165-75
3. Gedeon Mariam ... 164-76
4. Bill Denton ... 163-77
5. Joey Bansen ... 160-80
6. Josh Money ... 159-81
6. Adam Roy ... 159-81
8. Matthew Mariam ... 157-83
9. Karl Vaillancourt ... 156-84
9. John Weaver ... 156-84
11. George Smith ... 153-87
12. Dan Sinclair ... 151-89
12. Zack Klein ... 151-89
14. Alex Mena 150-90
15. Sandy Kory ... 138-102
15. Matthew Kory ... 138-102

Just one more week to go! Happy Holidays, everyone, from us here at the Pool(poop!)!
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Week 17: Schedule

No, I haven't forgotten the updates. Things have been Sarah Palin-like crazy around here, but I'm going to get the Week 16 results up today (Thursday), dammit. I promise. In the meantime, here is the schedule for Week 17.

The games start this Sunday at 1pm EST, so I'll need all of your picks by then. There is no Monday Night game this week, so we'll use the Sunday Night game instead. Its so designated below. Happy Holidays, and best of luck to everyone on this the final week of Matty's Third Annual Football Pool (POOP!)!

Indianapolis at Buffalo

New Orleans at Carolina

Jacksonville at Cleveland

New England at Houston

NY "Vickers Mark 6A Light Tank" Giants at Minnesota

San Francisco at St. Louis

Atlanta at Tampa Bay

Pittsburgh at Miami

Chicago at Detroit

Philadelphia at Dallas

Kansas City at Denver

Baltimore at Oakland

Tennessee at Seattle

Washington at San Diego

Green Bay at Arizona

Cincinnati at NY Jets (plus points)
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Week 16: Under Construction

Sorry for the delay, folks. I'm down in DC, away from my computer and all the stats it has on it. I'll be back in Philly tonight (where I live) and I'll do my best to get the results and week 17 schedule up soon after I arrive this evening.

-M

Week 16: Schedule

No more Thursday night games! Yay! Instead, we've got a Friday night game. Small blessings, people, small blessings.

This week begins this coming Christmas Day, Friday, December 25th, at 7:30 pm EST. I need all of your picks for the week by that time.

Happy Holidays. Here is your schedule for Week 16:

San Diego at Tennessee
Tampa Bay at New Orleans
Kansas City at Cincinnati
Buffalo at Atlanta
Houston at Miami
Seattle at Green Bay
Carolina at New York Giants
Oakland at Cleveland
Jacksonville at New England
Baltimore at Pittsburgh
St. Louis at Arizona
Detroit at San Francisco
Denver at Philadelphia
New York Jets at Indianapolis
Dallas at Washington
Minnesota at Chicago (total points)
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Week 15: Results

Two weeks go to and we've got some action at the top, folks. But first I'd like to take a moment to congratulate the Washington Redskins for engendering the most exclamations from national football announcers that I've ever heard in my 30 years following football. Mike "Bring that ass over here" Tirico actually said "Wow." on several occasions, Jon Gruden repeatedly said how amazed he was at how completely dominated the Redskins were, and telestrater extraordinaire Ron Jaworski said "perfectly executed" so many times I think he may have pulled a vocal cord. I'll add to Tirico's count and say, wow, what a pooptastic performance.

But I'm not here to bury the Redskins. No, they did that themselves about six weeks ago. [Ba-Da-BOOM!] Sank yoo, I vill be heer all zee veek.

Lets get right to the Week 15 action. When last we left them, there was a six thousand way tie for first place. Fortunately, five thousand nine hundred ninety six picked Washington last night (actually two), so it came down to just four people.

Those four were Jon Stover, Josh Money, Dave Labowitz, and Gedeon Mariam. Josh picked 36 Monday Night Points, Stover and Labowitz both picked 40, and Gedeon out-foxed them all by picking 42. The final score was Eleventy Boobtillion to negative 6, so, since Gedeon was the high man on the totem pole, he wins!

Congratulations, Gedeon! You win a year-long pass to see Robert Downey, Jr. kill Sir Arthur Conan Doyle all over again by kicking more ass in the new Sherlock Holmes! That's right, Downey essentially digs Sir Arthur back up again and poops right on his face! And you can see it as many times as you like! Yay!

No, actually you win more money than you can shake 69 sticks at. Unless it comes in check form (it does), in which case, you win the Weekly Standard Prize of $70.

Here are the final standings for Week 15:

1. Gedeon Mariam ... 10-6
1. Dave Labowitz ... 10-6
1. Jon Stover ... 10-6
1. Josh Money ... 10-6
5. Zack Klein ... 9-7
5. George Smith ... 9-7
5. Alex Mena ... 9-7
5. Bill Denton ... 9-7
5. Joey Bansen ... 9-7
10. Dan Sinclair ... 8-8
10. Matthew Kory ... 8-8
10. Sandy Kory ... 8-8
10. Matthew Mariam ... 8-8
10. Adam Roy ... 8-8
15. Karl Vaillancourt ... 7-9
15. John Weaver ... 7-9

Week 15 pushed Joey Bansen back down the standings a bit, so I hope I'm not jumping the gun when I say it looks like the final winners will come out of the pack of current leaders Dave Labowitz and Bill Denton, and the two a game behind them, Gedeon Mariam and Jon Stover. Joey Bansen is three games back, which he could make up in two weeks, but it'll be a tough assignment. After Joey, well, we're all just picking up scraps. Its desperation time, people. I predict 11 people pick Detroit next week.

In other certainly less important news, the hotly contested title for last place is looking like a two man race: me and my brother. I predict he'll forget to send in his picks one of these last two weeks and I'll pass him in the standings.

Here are your Current Overall Standings:

1. Dave Labowitz ... 156-68
1. Bill Denton ... 156-68
3. Gedeon Mariam ... 155-69
3. Jon Stover ... 155-69
5. Joey Bansen ... 153-71
6. Adam Roy ... 150-74
6. Josh Money ... 150-74
8. Matthew Mariam ... 148-76
9. Karl Vaillancourt ... 146-78
9. John Weaver ... 146-78
11. George Smith ... 145-79
12. Dan Sinclair ... 144-80
13. Alex Mena ... 142-82
14. Zack Klein ... 141-83
15. Sandy Kory ... 131-93
16. Matthew Kory ... 129-95

Week 16 Schedule to come. Anyone who is traveling over the holidays may want to just suck it up and send in your picks early.

Congratulations to Gedeon one more time, and Happy holidays to you all.
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Week 15: Update

Well, my little chickadees, we collectively sucked a fat hog this week. Everyone is either 9-6, 8-7, or 7-8. The six tied at the semi-pitiful record of 9-6 are - obviously - the ones in the running for the WSP. Here's the list with who they picked for tonight's game, followed by all the MNP machinations:

Alex Mena (REDSKINS!!!!!!)
Jon Stover (giants)
Dave Labowitz (giants)
Josh Money (giants)
Zack Klein (REDSKINS!!!!!!!)
Gedeon Mariam (giants)

If the giants win and the total score is...:

...between 0 and 39, Josh Money wins.
... either 40 or 41 then Jon Stover and Dave Labowitz split the WSP.
... 42 or higher, Gedeon Mariam wins.

If the REDSKINS!!!!!!! win and the total score is...:

...between 0-43, Alex Mena wins.
... 44 or greater, Zack Klein wins.

Best of luck to everyone. I'll be back tomorrow with the results, and the schedule for Week 16. It seems we're done with Thursday games. Instead, we've got a Friday night game this week, so I'll need your picks by Christmas day, Friday, December 25th at 7:30pm EST.
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Money Distribution In Case Of A Tie In The Overall Standings At The End Of The Season

If you're looking for your Week 15 schedule, you can find it here.

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This post outlines the distribution of winnings at the end of the season. In the years doing this pool we've never had a tie at the top before, and based on the current standings we won't have one this year either, but just in case, I thought it would be good to put in writing.

If there are no ties at all:

* The person finishing first overall wins $460.

* The person finishing second overall wins $225.

* The person finishing third overall wins $125.

If there is a two way tie for first:

* The first place and second place prize money is combined ($460 + $225 = $685) and divided by two ($685 / 2 = $342.50), so each first place winner will receive $342.50.

* The third place prize will be handed out to (or divided up equally between) the person(s) who finish directly behind the first place finishers.

Example:
Person 1 ... 200-2
Person 2 ... 200-2
Person 3 ... 199-3
Person 4 ... 199-3
Person 5 ... 198-4

- Person 1 and Person 2 are tied for first, so the first and second place prizes are combined and then split, with each person receiving half or receive $342.50.
- Person 3 and Person 4 are directly behind the first place finishers. As they are tied, they split the third place prize, so each receives $62.50.

If there is a three way (or more) tie for first:

* All the prize money would be combined ($810) and divided by the number of people tied for the position. (Example: $810 divided by 3, so each person wins $270.)

* No second or third place money would be handed out.

Example:
Person 1 ... 200-2
Person 2 ... 200-2
Person 3 ... 200-2
Person 4 ... 199-3
Person 5 ... 198-4

- Person 1, Person 2, and Person 3 are all tied for first. All the final money ($810) is split three ways and distributed equally to each, so that each receives $270.
- Person 4 and Person 5 receive nothing.

If there is a tie for second, but not for first:

* The first place person will receive the full first place prize.

* The people tied for second will receive the total of the second and third place prizes divided by the number of people tied for second (example: two people tied for second, you add the second and third place prizes [$225 + $125 = $350] and divide by the number of people tied for the position [2] and each person will get $175).

* No third place prize would be distributed.

Example:
Person 1 ... 200-2
Person 2 ... 199-3
Person 3 ... 199-3
Person 4 ... 199-3
Person 5 ... 198-4

- Person 1 wins the full first place prize of $460.
- Person 2, Person 3 and Person 4 are all tied for second. The second place and third place money ($225 and $125) is combined ($350) split three ways, and distributed equally to each, so that each receives $116.66.
- Person 5 receives nothing.

If there are no ties for first or second and a tie for third:

* First and second place prizes will be distributed normally.

* The third place prize ($125) will be split as many ways as there are third place finishers.


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I hope that is all clear. Please email me if you have any questions.
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